The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest

Hello there! Welcome to the FIFTIETH Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest! Not only does that mean that we’ve been poking fun at poetry for 50 weeks, but that we are almost to the birthday of terrible poeting!

I’m so proud!

If you’re just joining us, here‘s a basic run-down of how to write a terrible poem. I look more at destruction of construction and making mincemeat out of meter than I do at writing about something awful. Got it? Excellent.

Here are the specifics for this week:

  1. The Topic is FIFTY!
  2. The Length is FIFTY WORDS!
  3. Rhyming is not necessary. It’s already difficult enough to write only 50 words, Daddy-o.
  4. The terribleness is fifty -I mean, Make it terrible! 50-year-old members of the 50+ community will want to deluge you with 50 minutes of 50 historical events from 1969 (50 years ago).
  5. Let’s keep the Rating at PG or cleaner, by golly!

You have till 8:00 a.m. MST next Friday (November 8) to submit a poem.

Use the form below to be anonymous for a week.

Or, for a more social experience, include your poem or a link to it in the comments. If you don’t see your link within a day, leave a comment inquiring why.

Above all, have fun!

 

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Photo credit: Photo by Magda Ehlers from Pexels

31 thoughts on “The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest

  1. Heather Dawn November 2, 2019 / 10:39 am

    A Desperate Poet
    By Heather Dawn

    Forty-nine bad poems I’ve written,
    For the bad poetry competition,
    Forty-nine times, disappointment repetition.
    I even lose at being bad,
    At poetry, now that is sad.
    But I am a poetic mess,
    I cannot stop rhyming, I must confess!
    I will win this time!
    Maybe, this fiftieth time, I will!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Peregrine Arc November 2, 2019 / 12:20 pm

    Congratulations!!! Good luck everyone. May you write at your worst. ✏️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Bruce November 2, 2019 / 5:25 pm

    Some say it’s pretty nifty turning fifty.
    Alas! Alack! I can’t remember that far back.
    I probably got socks, underpants and tie;
    You see, it’s the thought that counts. Oh me! Oh my!
    It remains to be seen next week when I turn seventy
    If I get given a hemorrhoidectomy.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. trentpmcd November 2, 2019 / 6:58 pm

    Fifty, A Study in Awfulness
    by Trent P. McDonald

    Seven, a perfect number
    So I’ve heard
    Like Seven wonders
    By Zeus’ beard!
    Seventh heaven
    Better than paradise, weird
    But wouldn’t seven square
    Be better there?
    Forty nine
    Doesn’t sound great
    Like a gold mine
    A football team, mate
    Does adding one
    To squared Perfection
    Make it better
    Or dereliction?

    Deleting words to get to an exact 50made it even worse 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chelsea Owens November 8, 2019 / 10:41 pm

      It’s probably not what you want to hear, but this is a great poem!

      Liked by 1 person

      • trentpmcd November 9, 2019 / 5:47 am

        lol, so is it too good to be awful 😉 Remember, I may be a computer nerd, but I have a mathematics degree, so numbers are my friend…

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Nitin November 5, 2019 / 11:35 am

    For the fiftieth time, must I say
    That you have fifty ways
    Of walking down fifty street
    Where fifty men dangle their meat
    I mean meat not fifty inch meat
    You know skewers that are sweet
    Meat kebabs and puddin
    Yeah that’s right darlin
    Fifty shades of grey, ho hey

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chelsea Owens November 8, 2019 / 10:42 pm

      😀 Maybe I ought to make you keep yours G-Rated, Nitin!

      (And can you e-mail me your new site?)

      Like

  6. bereavedandbeingasingleparent November 7, 2019 / 3:06 pm

    I like Blancmange but it has more than 50 calories
    
I have 50 really annoying allergies

    I only have 50 hairs on my sad old head

    Can’t get any sleep on my 50 quid bed

    No money so have to be thrifty

    Bugger I feel like I am over FIFTY

    Liked by 1 person

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