The A Mused Poetry Contest 2/7/2021 – 3/5/2021 (AKA 7/2/21-5/3/21)

Phew! After last month‘s hilarious entries, I had a bit of trouble thinking of what our next venture should be. What to do, what to do…

  1. Let’s try an oldie but a goodie: A Funny Love Poem Inside a Greeting Card.
  2. Most greeting cards can’t hold a ballad, so a few stanzas ought to do us for the Length.
  3. I’d recommend rhyming. I mean, you are serious about this love interest, aren’t you?
  4. Yes, this is love (or something like unto it) but the Rating‘s PG or cleaner. After all, some kid might stumble across your offering while trying out all the musical cards.
  5. Only in stories do lovers say all the right words, remember every birthday and anniversary, and get just the right present. We are not writing a story, here, we’re writing a humorous poem. As such, make us laugh. Laughter’s the best way to a person’s heart; right?
    And, as a side note, whoever said this was a card expressing love to a person? What if you’re more fond of a juicy cheeseburger? Just a thought…

You have till 10:00 a.m. MST next MONTH (March 5) to submit a poem.

Use the form, below, to remain anonymous until results are posted.

Otherwise, include your poem or a link to it in the comments. You cannot simply link back to my post because WordPress is stupid and I will not receive it.



Photo by RODNAE Productions on


©2021 Chel Owens

30 thoughts on “The A Mused Poetry Contest 2/7/2021 – 3/5/2021 (AKA 7/2/21-5/3/21)

  1. My hubby always took Valentines literally and told me I was not his Valentine I was his wife..technically true and that worked for him until the kids got old enough and they taught him the error of his ways…haha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 😀 My husband is justifiably confused. Every year I tell him I don’t want anything for Excuse to Make Men Pay Money Day; then, on V Day itself, I feel sad that he didn’t do a thing…

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Poor Kevin. Yet another naive husband/partner who believes his wife/partner when she says she doesn’t want anything for VDay/birthday/anniversary/Christmas (waste of money, commercial blackmail, yaddah yaddah), only to realise that adhering to her wishes will resurface in every argument untill he dies. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Here’s my contribution for this round (of cheese) 😉

    Blessed are the cheesemakers

    You said you didn’t want a birthday gift,
    Hallmark cheesy made you vomit.
    But I’ve fallen for that before,
    so here’s some Wallace and some Gromit.

    Hence behold my new invention!
    No vapid Wensleydale, penicillin’s what it’s built on.
    Cambridgeshire meets jalapeno
    in my stunning chilli Stilton.

    I’ve named this fromage after you
    because it causes odd and vivid dreams
    and on the morrow, it is said,
    requires use of soothing creams.

    Enjoy your day, my curdle dove,
    as you wend your merry whey,
    and feast full well on this daily rind …
    My God, put that knife away!

    * For those poor souls unaware of Wallace and Gromit

    Liked by 2 people

  4. OK, here I can offer a just mere token of my burning heart-felt devotion. Sort of.

    Heart Strings.

    Accept this humble Valentines card, my sweet,
    Know ’tis only you who makes my life complete,
    You cause my happy heart to lightly skip a beat,
    I freely give you my heart- consider my card your receipt.

    My love, my love for you runs true and deep,
    Know I dream of you at night before I sleep,
    So my love, close to your heart my love-note keep,
    I’d hand you a few roses too- but I’m too damned cheap.

    Liked by 1 person

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