The Terrible Poetry Contest

Welcome to the weekly Terrible Poetry Contest!

Read HERE to learn what terrible poetry means. It’s all there. Stop asking. And now that you’re a pro, here are this week’s specific instructions:

  1. Last week’s winner, Dumbestblogger, picked a limerick on the Theme of Grain. That’s right: a limerick about grain. Click here or here or here or here or here to see times we’ve done limericks. They’re one of my favorite forms and are fun!
    A limerick is five lines: AABBA, in anapestic meter.
  2. The Length is five lines.
  3. A traditional limerick Rhymes. Stay traditional, like 100% whole wheat.
  4. Make it terrible! I’m not certain how rotten grains can be, but have great faith in your ability regardless. If nothing else, we’ll be nourished by carbohydrates.
  5. Rating: PG-13 or cleaner. You do know what a limerick is, right?

You have till 8:00 a.m. MST IN TWO WEEKS: Thursday, March 3 to submit a poem. I have things this week, so we’re running the contest an extra week longer. Yay!

Use the form below if you want to be anonymous for a week.

For a more social experience, include your poem or a link to it in the comments. Please alert me if your pingback or poem does not show up within a day.

The winner gains bragging rights, a badge, and the option to choose the next week’s topic and type of poem.


©2022 Chel Owens

Photo by Maddi Bazzocco on Unsplash -ignore the nuts

48 thoughts on “The Terrible Poetry Contest

  1. obbverse February 21, 2022 / 1:23 am

    Five limericky lines on grains? Good. For those with a bent for the humorous more familiar territory than pantoums or centos. I might even say more like grist to the mill. (Sorry.)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nope, Not Pam February 21, 2022 / 3:02 am

    I hope I have time to do this one Chelsea

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chel Owens February 21, 2022 / 7:56 am

      I haven’t even had time to venture out and read others’ posts this week (as you’ve seen)! Do what you can; you’ve got two weeks this time ’round.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Nope, Not Pam February 21, 2022 / 12:10 pm

        Well that’s good news 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Frank Hubeny February 21, 2022 / 4:58 am

    Terrible Limerick – Grain

    There once was tiny wheat grain
    all soaked in a wonderful rain.
    He sprouted. Oh, dear!
    Now he’s done it I fear.
    He thanks God that he ain’t got a brain.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Frank Hubeny February 21, 2022 / 7:06 am

    (Unfortunately, I came up with a second stanza.)

    The grain in the dirt in the pot
    praised God for the stuff that it’s got.
    “I won’t worry away
    on this cold wintry day.
    Bodda bee! Bodda hye! Bodda bot!”

    Liked by 3 people

  5. M. February 21, 2022 / 11:29 am


    My distaste for barley & rye
    is why I hate blueberry pie
    Dad offered a sip
    But, I took more of a nip
    then barfed blueberry pie in his eye

    Liked by 4 people

  6. Richmond Road February 21, 2022 / 5:00 pm

    I limp because I am in pain
    I am sensitive. Let me explain.
    It all has to do
    With a lump in my shoe
    It is sand. But only one grain.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Richmond Road February 21, 2022 / 9:44 pm

      Whoops … another rushed (and botched) job. Should have read ‘I’m in pain’.


    • Chel Owens March 5, 2022 / 12:16 pm

      Obbverse, this is a very clever poem. I simply could not name it as ‘terrible.’


  7. obbverse February 21, 2022 / 6:36 pm

    Field Of Dreams.

    This new farmers lot was not a happy lot
    Till crop rotation helped fill in the plot,
    Come harvest, in a quiet green field
    A bounty of seeds’n’buds is revealed-
    So, wild oats adds little profit to the pot.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Chel Owens March 5, 2022 / 12:17 pm

      Very clever and a bit terrible, Obbverse. 🙂


  8. Gr8BigFun February 21, 2022 / 7:58 pm

    A whole two weeks and I’m ready to go on day one. That’s a first!!!


    Da bins damn full of dem rats;
    Dey filled it all up wid der shats.
    Gone ruined da grain,
    From hunger we ’ere slain,
    Me should’ve procured dem damn cats

    Liked by 2 people

    • Chel Owens February 21, 2022 / 9:38 pm

      Your can always submit more than one poem! 😉


  9. dumbestblogger February 21, 2022 / 8:05 pm

    Brave Little Train

    There once was a brave little train
    Filled to the the brim with some grain
    It jumped off the tracks
    And sat in the rain
    The grain has now all turned to hay

    Liked by 4 people

  10. Jim Borden February 24, 2022 / 9:35 am

    I’m not surprised that Dumbestblogger picked something fun like a limerick…

    Liked by 1 person

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