Hello and welcome to the biweekly Terrible Poetry Contest!
Don’t know what ‘terrible poetry’ is? Of course you do! Think of the best poet you know; I can guarantee that s/he wrote a terrible poem. Odds are, it was about teen angst. See? -not so difficult. Now, pick up that keyboard, read through my guide, and start poeming!
Here are the specifics:
- We need a Theme and Form. Frank won last time, and says: I would recommend the type of poem being at least one stanza of four lines of common meter. That would be something like “Mary Had A Little Lamb” but there are many variations of the rhyme and meter that would be recognized as common meter. The theme would be to parody some nursery rhyme or start from scratch and write an entirely new one.
- Length: at least one stanza of four lines of common meter.
- Baa baa, black sheep; should we try to Rhyme? Yes, sir; yes, sir; every other line.
- Mother Goose says make it terrible! You’d better do it, before Jack Horner gets in that corner and eats all your curds and your whey!
- Rating: G or cleaner. Ask me not why, or the children may cry.
You have till 8:00 a.m. MDT on Thursday, April 28 to submit a poem.
Use the form below if you want to be anonymous for a week. It hasn’t gone through unless you see a message saying it has.
For a more social experience, include your poem or a link to it in the comments. Please alert me if your pingback or poem does not show up within a day.
The winner gains bragging rights, a badge, and the option to choose the next iteration’s topic and type of poem.

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©2022 Chel Owens
Very nice description of the form in item 3: “Baa baa, black sheep; should we try to Rhyme? Yes, sir; yes, sir; every other line.”
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🙂 Thanks!
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Frankie is a little trim,
Who never wears clean clothes.
All the piggies follow him
Wherever Frankie goes.
On the way to school one day,
He stopped to smell a flower.
The piggies looked at each to say,
Let’s all do a boy devour.
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Wonderful, John! This was very nearly a first-place pick for me!
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Geoff’s was terrific.
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A couple to do with current events still reverberating ’round Tinsel Town. Well, since we are talking about people being childish…
Chris Gets A Hand.
Will, he had a little slap,
Rock reeled back from the blow,
Will wouldn’t say ‘Chris, shut your trap;’
To no more Oscars Will he go.
Jack And Ill Will.
It was ON
‘Tween Amber and John
Their freak-show biz deal Deppinitely over.
After many years,
Crossed words, crocodile tears
Their lawyers settled, finally in the clover.
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Very punny and very funny. “Deppinitely” LOL!
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Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the King’s horses and all the King’s men
Had breakfast that morning.
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😀 😀 Great, Frank!
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I’ve done what I can to be terrible.
https://michaelsfishbowl.com/2022/04/24/the-day-terrible-poetry-contest/
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