-“Hello, and welcome -yet again- to our meeting of Altitude Anonymous. I am your group leader for this quarter, Slim J.”
“Hi, Slim J.”
-“Thank you. Let’s open this meeting with our Share Session. Who’d like to start?”
…..
-“Anyone?” “Ah. Yes, of course; Bean P.”
“Alrighty. So, as you know, I’m the team lead in a high profile sales environment over at-“
-“No names, Bean.”
“Yes; of course. Silly rule but -as team lead, I oversee operations on both the East and West Coasts as well as inspiring the logistics and marketing departments in global aspir-“
-“Shares are two minutes, Bean.”
“Two minutes. Right. Well; okay then. -Team lead is, as you know, vital to any organization. Without my input and direction, no one would know which end went where -ya know what I mean?”
-“Beeean.”
“Right.” *Ahem.* “Step Three’s humility and I met my goals and did very well. As always.”
=”Oookay, then. Er… good work, Bean.”
“You’re welcome!”
-“Who else wants to share? …Gian T? Yeah; go ahead.”
“Hi. I’m Gian T.”
“Hi, Gian T.“
“My weekly goal was walking in a small person’s shoes, so I took mah girl’s heels and hit the clubs -but that bi-“
-“Giaaan”
“Er; that beautiful woman’s got tiny ass feet so I broke ’em right away and was barefoot all night.”
-“Thank you, Gian. Anyone else?”
“I have one.”
-“Okay.”
“Hello; I’m Lank E.”
“Hi, Lank E.”
“Hi. Hi, guys. I’ve really been trying to not not see -you know- little people. It’s so hard! They’re like kids: popping up behind your cart or standing in an aisle with the peaches right behind you-“
-“Um, Lank-“
“An’ then there’s that time I got in my truck ’cause, you know, my truck -and I drove over a little person’s car but luckily they weren’t in it when I back up they just hadn’t parked it in a very obvious spot. But, that’s what I’m saying: that the little ones are so darned hard to see-“
-“Ms. Lank?”
“Just Lank, thanks. Yeah, so, I didn’t do so great at seeing littles. Better luck next week, I guess.”
-“Well! It’s getting late so let’s wrap up with The Altitude Anonymous Pledge.”
“I, LaSliGiaPecTalBig, am tall, but I can think small. No matter where I go, I can move slow. When others are in the way, I can politely say, “I respect your space, ‘though I can’t see your face.”
-“Thanks, guys -and gals. Pecos has the treat next time. See you then.”
©2022 Chel Owens

As Spike Milligan so wisely said ‘The higher, the fewer’. 🙂
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😀 Short people live longer, I’ve been told.
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I’ve heard that too but I’ve also heard we’re all getting taller and all living longer, so that’s a puzzle.
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🙂
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You write very cool short stories
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Seemed like a tall tale, to me.
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I wasn’t even trying to be funny
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I was, in my own lame way.
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😀 Well, there ya go. It just comes naturally.
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❤️ Thanks, M.
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Ditto on the previous remark… You DO write cool short stories!
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Thank you, Annette. All the blogs I read inspire me (yours included).
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This is a story best read when high.
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😀 👏👏 You win.
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Funny that people see this as a short story. More a tall tale
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😀 Indeed it is.
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Tis a high-minded story.
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I clearly wasn’t reaching high enough for the puns on this one..
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seems like they should start a basketball team…
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That’s a little height-ist of you to say. 😉
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I do need to be more sensitive… 🙂
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I had a good chortle. The long and tall of it… Witty, fun to read, and not short on laughs.
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Oh man…. I really need to step up my puns!
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