We couldn’t let another year pass by without our sort-of annual tradition: the Terribly Poetry Contest, Christmas Special!!
Whenever our illustrious judge remembers to, we forget all rules of terribleness and simply have fun in the spirit of FUN.
- The theme is a parody of a Christmas song. We’re talking carols; like “Santa, Baby,” “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth,” “Jingle Bell Rock,” “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer,” “Deck the Halls,” “Silent Night….”
(But, for the love of all that’s holly, DO NOT use “Christmas Shoes” as your inspiration or I may be forced to send three spirits to keep you up all night.)
- The official length is as long as it takes you to poke fun at your carol before running out of ideas…
- Jingle bells, Batman smells; most songs rhyme so rhyme this time (if the original rhymes).
- Good King Wenceslas looked about, rocking around the Christmas tree, away in a manger of parody. Make us laugh, make us cry; mostly, give us something to look forward to this year.
- Finally, keep things child-appropriate. Christmas is about children, after all.
You have till 8:00 p.m. MST on Friday, December 23 to submit a poem.
Use the form below if you want to be anonymous until I post the results. The form hasn’t saved what you submitted unless you see a message saying it has.
Or, for a more social experience, include your poem or a link to it in the comments. Please alert me if your pingback or poem does not show up within a day.
The winner gains bragging rights, a badge, and a physical Christmas gift in the mail from Chel.
©2022 Chel Owens
Said the husband as she burnt the ham
Do you smell what I smell?
(Do you smell what I smell?)
It’s charred, it’s charred; the oven’s all alight
With the men here to fi’re fight
With the men, here, to fi’re fight...